According to a new survey married couples end up doing more house work than they did when they were single.
Married women, on average, do 7 hours more house work (cleaning, making food, grass cutting, laundry, etc) per week compared to non-married women.
Married men meanwhile do 5 hours more house work.
Why is this? Its not because of kids, because the statistics for parents and non-parents are roughly the same. They're both doing more house work.
Part of the reason is because married couples are more worried about keeping the place clean, whereas as bachelors/bachelorettes they were able to slack off and not worry about it as much.
The second problem is women and men REDOING specific tasks because their lover didn't do it "properly", the "right way", or up to the other person's standards.
In my own relationship I know this to be true.
"You're not making the rice properly."
"You didn't scrub this pan the right way."
"You missed a spot while cleaning."
These sayings are usually followed by "Nevermind, I'll do it myself" so its up to her standards...
So for men, the case often appears where they say "screw it, let her do it" and then slack off on the house work because the female in the relationship will scrub the dishes, make the food, clean, etc. so that its up their particular standard.
It basically comes down to a difference in cleanliness standards.
Men see a dirty pan, they clean it, they use it later.
Women see a dirty pan, the clean it, they scrub it, they clean it again, and they use it later. As a general rule, women are much more paranoid about cleanliness, germs, etc.
Men will wear a shirt, they'll toss it in a corner, and a week later or a couple days later they will wear it again. Men will keep wearing the same set of underwear for weeks at a time, until the smell becomes noticeably bad.
Women in contrast change their underwear almost every day, and rarely reuse the same clothes until its been cleaned.
You can probably think of more examples, but I've made my point. Its not that the item of clothing or the frying pan isn't clean (or clean enough), its simply that men and women have different standards.
My advice? Men need to up their standards a bit, and women need to settle down and don't be so paranoid about cleanliness.
After all, cleanliness is next to godliness, and that's basically impossible to achieve.
See Also
The Politics of Housework
House Chores for Men and Stay at Home Dads
The Chore Wars
The Good Wife's Guide and Advice for Young Brides
Why I Want a Wife
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Wednesday, March 25, 2009
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