Exercise Humour for Men and Women

Call it my horror / amusement of America's growing obesity problems, but I think the USA's problems with controlling its weight has reached a point where it is just plain FUNNY.

I mean, could you imagine if the USA were invaded by a hostile power (like in the 1984 film Red Dawn, or the 2012 remake) and the majority of Americans were too fat to put up much of a struggle?

It would just be laughable. The USA, with all of its claims of military superiority, doesn't really have the stomach (haha, fat pun) for a large scale invasion - whether it be by communists, aliens or even alien communists.

What is worse is that for those Americans who are fit, they're not fit for "combat" because their idea of a war is watching UFC or watching the U.S. military bomb Iraq on CNN.

The USA hasn't had a draft since the Vietnam War (which ended in 1975) so the average American really hasn't got a clue.

The average American only exercises 17 minutes per day (according to a 2012 survey). Now when you realize that some Americans exercise 1 or 2 hours per day, what you also realize is that many Americans simply don't exercise at all.

We have only to look at the sales of Rascal Scooters and the percentage of obese people who simply don't walk and instead use a scooter to do their daily activities.

Its reached a point where Americans are just a ridiculous joke.

Now I admit the exercise industry has its share of jokes too. I've shared a few below. But in comparison if I had to choose between bending over and ripping my pants because I am too fat for my pants... and struggling to do an exercise and looking like a fool, I am going to choose the exercise.

Maybe its just me, but being fit is worth it the pain and embarrassment along the way. Being fat is just plain embarrassing and the pain will never go away.

And this is why you should NOT get breast implants.

Father of the Year

Father of the Year

Because Having 3 Kids is No Excuse

For more Frugal Exercise ideas visit Cardio Trek - Toronto Personal Trainer.

Why Christmas is Evil... and why I love it.

Jesus was black, Jewish and born in March. He has very little to do with the modern abomination of church and idolatry that claims to celebrate his birth.

Rather Christmas is a pagan holiday, and if you follow the ten commandments - a sin if you celebrate it.

Why? Because it is idolatry to worship Saint Nicholas. That is what the modern pagan holiday of Christmas really is. Nothing more than good old fashioned idolatry.

With greed and gluttony tossed in as well. And if you add in lust - songs like Santa Baby, etc - well that just makes it an even bigger mockery.

Pagan holidays are all about partying, getting drunk, eating a lot, sex, greed, gluttony, etc. Hence why Christmas is a pagan holiday.

In which case I must admit I rather enjoy it. If anything we should have MORE pagan holidays.

And we do. Easter, Halloween, New Years, St Patricks Day, Valentines Day - they're all pagan holidays. None of them are remotely pure or virtuous. And they have almost nothing to do with religion or the occult. It is basically just an excuse to eat, drink and party.

And I must admit these are some of my favourite holidays. Any excuse to drink alcohol and eat lots of chocolate, huzzah.

And this is why most people even celebrate these holidays in the first place. Because it is a party and a celebration. If there was no celebration people would treat it the same way they do religious holidays like Lent.

What do you do for Lent? You give something up that is a vice. Like giving up smoking or giving up reality tv. Nobody celebrates Lent. Most people don't even consider it to be a real holiday because they don't get the day off from work.

The Male Brain on Internet Porn

Watch this TED Talks presentation about the effects of internet porn addiction on the male brain.

Oooo!




The presentation is in response to Philip Zimbardo's "The Demise of Guys?" TED talk and in this presentation Gary Wilson asks whether our brains evolved to handle the hyperstimulation of today's Internet enticements. He also discusses the disturbing symptoms showing up in some heavy Internet users, the surprising reversal of those symptoms, and the science behind these 21st century phenomena.

More About Gary Wilson

Gary is host of www.yourbrainonporn.com. The site arose in response to a growing demand for solid scientific information by heavy Internet erotica users experiencing perplexing, unexpected effects: escalation to more extreme material, concentration difficulties, sexual performance problems, radical changes in sexual tastes, social anxiety, irritability, inability to stop, and obsessive-compulsive symptoms.

As a physiology teacher with a particular interest in the latest neuroscience discoveries, Gary was aware that their symptoms might be the result of addiction-related brain changes. Applying the website's concepts of brain plasticity, many former users have braved withdrawal, reversed their symptoms and restored normal sexual responsiveness.

The site has been linked to from hundreds of threads in forums from over thirty countries, with posts numbering in the thousands. Gary blogs for "Psychology Today" and "The Good Men Project" on the extreme plasticity of adolescent brains, the evolutionary context for today's flood of novel cyber "mates," and the neurochemical reasons why superstimulating Internet delivery has unexpected effects on the brain.

In the spirit of ideas worth spreading, TEDx is a program of local, self-organized events that bring people together to share a TED-like experience. At a TEDx event, TEDTalks video and live speakers combine to spark deep discussion and connection in a small group. These local, self-organized events are branded TEDx, where x = independently organized TED event. The TED Conference provides general guidance for the TEDx program, but individual TEDx events are self-organized.* (*Subject to certain rules and regulations)

Valeria Lukyanova Exercising + Makeup

Have you heard of Valeria Lukyanova?

She is the Ukrainian model with a body and face that strongly resembles the classic Barbie doll - and is billed as such in advertising work that she does.

But how did she get that insanely fit body and her face to look like Barbie?

Well the face is mostly makeup apparently. Although she has been accused of using plastic surgery, Valeria Lukyanova maintains her looks are completely the result of well executed makeup designed to make her look more like Barbie.

The name she prefers to use is "Amatue", which may sound great in her native Ukrainian, but in English looks and sounds like Amateur.

She has also been accused of having her photos photoshopped, which some of them might be, but if you watch videos of her you can see she clearly looks like that in real life. So if there is any photoshopping going on the changes are comparatively minor... things like trying to make her eyes look bigger so she looks more doll-like and un-human. And to be fair, she is already using makeup to make her eyes look bigger so photoshop seems like overkill.

See the video below to see how she manages her makeup.

The thing however is that Valeria Lukyanova claims to maintain her physique using nothing more than exercise - and judging by her workout videos (shown below) she is using low weights and high repetitions to accomplish this goal. According to a Certified Personal Trainer from Cardio Trek using low weights and a high reps workout would result in an ultra thin body, with very little muscle tone and very little fat.

Now you might think, well what about her breasts? If she is exercising that much, shouldn't she lose some of her breast size by working out so much?

Not necessarily. Some women are simply blessed with well-developed breasts, and breast size doesn't decrease dramatically unless they're either anorexic or taking steroids. Natural breasts will ultimately look natural. And looking at the photo above, they're not HUGE and they do appear to be proportional for the size of her chest. And certainly not abnormal when you consider the number of women I've seen at the beach with similar proportions (although they are usually teens or in their 20s if they look that perky).

What is more unnerving is how thin she looks, but without that bony look that anorexic women typically get. Again, this could be due to her exercise routine. So lets have a look at her exercise videos below and see what she is actually doing.

So yes, we can conclude that she is exercising to keep her body ultra thin, but maintaining just a small amount of muscle tone so she doesn't look anorexic. Chalk that down to a very specific exercise routine.

But lets imagine you want to look like Barbie too. Can you do it? Is it even possible?

Well with exercise, you could certainly try to get part of the way there, and you would look fabulous. But its doubtful that you have the right facial proportions and some impressive skills with makeup to do what Valeria Lukyanova does.

See also

10 Tips for maintaining a Beach Perfect Body

Weight Loss + Loose Skin