Cunnilingus Class

9 Funny Signs in Businesses

Proof that having a sense of humour (and a dirty mind) is sometimes good for business.

Banned Condom Commercial

Wow. I can't imagine why the condom commercial further below was banned. I guess it was too over the top. :p

Definitely funny however.

To me advertisements like this prove that there is a market for mature channels that allow traditional style advertising (like insurance ads, car ads, beer commercials, etc) but with a mature theme.

Of course I could also argue that we now have the internet, netflix, video streaming, etc and that advertising censors don't apply online - and therefore making ads like this still have value because you can simply promote it online and mavens (people like me who post funny/interesting stuff for free) will promote it for free.

But whatever. It is effective advertising.

How I missed my chance to have a threesome

Back when I was 21 years old (so many years ago) I was dating a girl who was 18 and still in highschool.

Everything was going fine with the relationship - so I thought - until I found out that she was seeing 7 other guys on a regular basis.

And I was like WTF? Why are you seeing (and sleeping with) 7 other guys?

And she responded that she is just friends with them - friends with benefits. And that I was the same thing, just a friend with benefits.

Myself I was quite heartbroken. So I gave her an ultimatum, break it off the other guys and go out with only me.

Because quite frankly I wanted a monogamous relationship. I didn't want to share her with other men.

She said she would think about it.

Then out of the blue her best friend, a girl she hangs out with a lot whom I had previously met, calls me up and wants to hang out. Clueless, I say okay. So she comes to my university and we hang out on the campus and in my dorm room and I get the distinct impression she is hitting on me. She was saying things like how her boyfriend wasn't doing it for her any more and she was thinking of breaking up with him, etc. Basically trying to put the moves on me.

Meanwhile I am still in my monogamy frame of mind and I politely just hang out with her, nothing happens and she eventually went home looking disappointed.

Now at the time I thought my girlfriend (if you can call her that when she is sleeping with 7 other men) was just sending her friend to spy on me. It was pretty obvious that this was a setup for something - I thought it was to see if I would cheat on her and so I did not.

However I had interpreted everything all wrong. Years later I have finally figured it out.

Her friend was there to determine if I would sleep with her, and then the two of the girls together would somehow (deviously) organize a threesome or some kind of group sex event.

It is blatantly obvious now what their plan was, but at the time I was young, naive and clueless.

I am certain it would have ended badly too. I am too much of a monogamy person that I would have gotten jealous of her sleeping with other men. Other women I could deal with, but not other men.

72-year-old retired boxer beats up burglar

A burglar who broke into a house and threatened a 72-year-old pensioner with a knife got more than he bargained for when the elderly victim turned out to be a retired boxer who left him bruised and bleeding.

Frank Corti, 72, who served with the Royal Engineers in North Africa from 1956-58, dodged the knife and punched Gregory McCalium, 23, twice in the face, giving him a black eye and a swollen lip and sent him reeling to the floor. He then restrained the attacker until police arrived.

McCalium, a barman who was down on his luck, was given a four-and-a-half year prison sentence at Oxford Crown Court on June 24th 2013 for aggravated burglary and was told by the judge he "got what he deserved".

The court heard that Mr Corti was at home in Botley, Oxford, with his wife Margaret, 72, when the young McCalium, a neighbour, forced his way in at 8 AM on August 19th 2012 . McCalium was drunk and depressed from a recent bout of bad luck - and his bac luck was about to get a lot worse.

Speaking after the case, Mr Corti said: "I was scared when he first drew the knife, but my old training must have kicked in because I just punched him as hard as I could and he went down like a sack of spuds. If you can't defend what's yours, where are we at?"

 McCalium had denied the charge and claimed he could not remember what happened. Which is perhaps true. Drunk and punched twice in the head, he may not remember trying to rob the elderly man at all.

But it certainly makes for a funny story.

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